One Act

Narrator-The scene opens on a small bar. It is late in the afternoon and people are beginning to trickle in. A tired song plays lazily through worn-out speakers. Shelly sits alone stirring the ice of a drink that she’s freshly finished. Jim enters the bar with his hands in his pockets. He strolls around for a minute examining the wildlife, and then he approaches Shelly.

Jim-(To Narrator) Wait. Wait a minute.

Narrator- What? Me? I’m just trying to tell the story.

Jim- But if you tell it wrong. I end up looking like an asshole.

Narrator- And?

Jim- I just wanted the chance to explain.

Narrator- Go ahead, nobody’s stopping you.

Shelly- What about my story. We are here because of what he did to me (points at Jim).

Narrator- Well I already know what happened to you, but I don’t know why he did it. And as the Narrator it’s good to know. It changes how I tell it.

Jim- I just wanted to say that I didn’t come in here intending to use that stuff.

Shelly- Liar. You don’t carry something like that around without intent.

Jim- If you hadn’t just written me off to begin-

Shelly- ME? I’m the victim here.

Jim- You treated me like- like- like my Mother.

Shelly- What the hell does your mother have to do with anything?

Jim- She didn’t want me. She didn’t abuse me or anything like that. I mean sometimes she would forget to feed me, but she never hit me. Sometimes I wished she would though. I wanted her to care enough to hit me. All my life I’ve had this huge frustration. Is it just to much to ask to be loved by a woman?You just wrote me off like I was nothing.
Narrator- Okay, now can get on with this? (Jim nods his head in response.) Good. (Assumes tone of narration) He strolls around for a minute examining the wildlife, and then he approaches Shelly.

Jim- Hey, this seat taken? (He points to the empty stool)
Shelly- No, but neither is that one over there (She points to an empty stool on the other side of the room)
Jim- I just thought that a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be sitting all alone.
Shelly- (Looks him up and down) Sorry, I’m just not drunk enough yet.
Jim-Fine, but I’m sitting here anyways.
Shelly- Go ahead, its supposed to be a free country and all. (To the audience) So I told him off. That doesn’t make up for what he did.

(Bartender comes in and plops down a large empty glass onto the table, as if he has had to do this a thousand times before. Then he leaves.)
Narrator- Shelly gets up to go to the bathroom, then Jim-
Shelly- Then the bastard slipped something into my drink.
Narrator- Shelly returns from the bathroom.

Jim- He brought you your drink.
Shelly- What? Oh, it looks great. (Pause) Look, I’m sorry that I came off as such a bitch. (She stirs her drink) It’s been one of those weeks. You know what I mean?
Jim- Yeah, no, not really. I mean I don’t tend to tell people off just because I’ in a mood.
Shelly- Well you were hitting on me- not everyone appreciates that sort of thing. (Takes a sip)
Jim- I know, but how is a guy supposed to start a conversation with someone that he is interested in. I walk up to a girl, at a bar, in a store, or at a café, and no matter what I say- I come off sounding like a jerk, a first rate loser, a real moron, a classic ass.
Shelly- A girl loses self respect when she sells herself out for some two-bit pick-up line (mimicking him) Is this seat taken, a pretty girl like you shouldn’t be sitting all alone. You could have tried to be creative.
Jim- I have to admit that your comeback was excellent. It succeeded in making me feel like shit.
Shelly- Don’t look so sour. We’re talking now right.
Jim- (To Audience) Yeah we were talking, after I had poisoned her.
Jim- What do you do?
Shelly- Yesterday, I was a Nurse.
Jim- What happened? Were you fired? Or were you just like ‘take this job and shove it.’
Shelly- I accidently gave a patient the wrong medication and she had an allergic reaction. An Adult probably would have been fine, but she was only three. She died a few hours later. I resigned before they had the chance to fire me.
Jim- (Softly) Fuck… that does make for a bad week.
(She gulps down the rest of her drink without the straw.)
Shit.

Shelly- Life’s a bitch. One little mistake can have such big consequences.
Jim- (To the audience) She finished off another drink and then she asked me to dance.
Narrator- Jim and Shelly dance. Shelly breaks away from Jim to support herself on the bar.
Shelly- I don’t feel well. I’m dizzy.
Jim- You look a little sick.
Shelly- I know we just met and all- but would you take me home?
Jim- No. Not this time.
Shelly- What do you mean not this time? You can’t change it now. This isn’t real. Stick to the facts.
Jim- I’m sorry Shelly. I’m different now. I’m going to do things differently. (Jim leaves)
Narrator- Jim takes Shelly home.
Shelly-Goodbye Jim.
Narrator- Shelly drops her glass onto the ground, where it shatters into a million pieces.

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